Genealogical Artifact

When ten years of age, all of my friends and I suddenly developed an obsession for Victorinox Swiss Army knifes. In retrospect I believe this obsession might have stemmed from my Swiss heritage, and memories of my grandpa pridefully wielding his fathers Swiss Army knife, and vehemently explicating the quality of Swiss products in general. When the time came when our parents would allow us to purchase our own pocketknife, we determinedly chose the Swiss Army brand. All of us went to Ace hardware and chose a knife from the assortment of colors. I chose a green ducks unlimited edition. The knife consisted of a blade, file, scissors, toothpick and tweezers. I thought the pocketknife was extremely useful and empowering, a devise that showed my maturity. While choosing my green Victorinox from the display case, my eyes kept reverting to a particular model of Swiss Army knife, the Swisschamp a 1” thick pocketknife that contained an assortment of 33 different tools, and or implements. Among the more alluring tools were pliers, magnifying glass, wood saw and a ballpoint pen decorating the substantial toolset. The knife had a lifetime warranty and was built for me specifically or so I thought. I euphorically procured the knife from Santa a couple of months later, and I couldn’t wait to use this master of all pocketknives. I stored the Swisschamp in its original packaging and kept it safely tucked away in my dresser.

            The day came when I had the opportunity to proudly tote the beast on a scout camp. This tool would most definitely prove to be useful in the wild. As I finished setting up camp I quickly grabbed my Swisschamp, and joined my friends carving sticks with inferior knives. As I started carving a stick my friends and fellow scouts immediately were astonished. While I was carving the stick I suddenly felt like I was dulling the blade on a menial task, and it bothered me, so I stopped and went back to my tent and grabbed the smaller knife that I had previously purchased and started using it instead. In fact the knife was so impressive to me that I didn’t use it all that much throughout the years. I didn’t want to ware it out. It was more like a trophy for show only. I was more infatuated with the design and sheer presence of the knife that I didn’t want to damage it in any way. The knife would remain safely tucked away in my drawer and every so often through the years I would admire its beauty and laugh because of its pristine condition. The Knife has 33 tools, cost a lot of money, and I only used it a couple of times over the years.  To this day the Swisschamp remains one of the few items that I have taken with me, as I have moved from place to place.